Bill's Zombies

	I have to realize... in case of being chased by zombies, I'm the slow
	fat guy yall will leave behind as a distraction. heh.

	[https://twitter.com/mrbill/status/1123076110844088320]

	===

	Except thanks to your useful skill set you not only survive, but thrive.
	Eventually you meet up again with the main ensemble, who feel guilty
	about it all, but for you (choose one):

		a) it's all water under the bridge,
		b) feel betrayed,
		c) will have your revenge,
		d) saw it coming


======

a) water under the bridge:

"...Guys... It's all water under the bridge."

You give them the rundown of everything that has happened over the
past 18 months.  You give the team instructions on how to make it
to the valley, give them a few bags of beef jerky, a few gallons
of water, and start your return trip.

As you make it to Perimeter Fence 13... there's a problem.  The
zombies have attacked the gate control box. No matter what they do, 
they won't be able to open the gate, but then again, neither will
you.  Without chasing away the zombies and repairing the controls,
it's all walking from here, and here in the desert, that means
certain death.

You give them the plan.  Alex and Chris act as a distraction, while
Sam picks off any stragglers from a safe distance.  With all the ammo
you brought, missed shots won't be an issue.  Once that is in play,
time to fix the controls.

The controls are a mess, but you can... Oh no.  The timer is broken.  You
knew you should have put it on the other side of the fence... but this
control box was ready to rock, and besides, the way the gate works... it
would always fail secure.  And that is the problem.  Someone will need 
to force the gate open and hold it until the team makes it through and
then make sure it seals shut.  The only one that can do this is you.

It was an easy enough feat, but now you'll need to sprint a quarter
mile down the fence line to the man gates. The team will meet you there. 
You reach out to turn the knob... "Ouch!"

You look at your hand and see metal and bone fragments... clearly from
one of Sam's shots.  With any luck there won't be any fresh zombie
blood. Oh, who are we kidding. The flesh around the cut begins to
necrotize. It won't be long now.

You look to the team at the other end of the series of gates... their
mouths agape.

"Guys... I'm...  Please.  Shoot me now."

With tears rolling down their faces, Sam takes aim.  A sharp crack
echos across desert. It's done.  You died a hero's death, and were
still human.  Well, mostly human.

===============

b) limited trust:

"...Guys... It's all water under the bridge."

Except, it wasn't.  You give them the rundown of everything that has
happened over the past 18 months.  You say you'll lead them to the valley,
but if they give even the slightest hint of betrayal, or if any problems
pop up where it's a choice between you or one of them, you're looking out
for number one.  You share a bag of beef jerky and hand out a few water
bottles.  Not your full supply, but such is the nature of these things
when there is no reason to trust them.

As you make it to Perimeter Fence 13... there's a problem.  The
zombies have attacked the gate control box. No matter what they do, 
they won't be able to open the gate, but then again, neither will
you.  Without chasing away the zombies and repairing the controls,
it's all walking from here, and here in the desert, that means
certain death.  Fortunately, you stashed an ATV on the other side,
so at least you and maybe one other person will be able to make
it to the valley without turning into a mummy.

You give them the plan.  Alex and Chris act as a distraction, while
Sam picks off any stragglers from a safe distance.  You share some
of your ammo and hope Sam doesn't miss.

"How about if *I* am the one to..."

Seriously? Alex is pulling this when they were the one to suggest 
that you should be used as a distraction without even telling you?
At least you have the decency to say what you are doing, and have
a fully developed plan that isn't designed to kill anyone.

"You know what? There's a series of man gates over there.  I have
a four wheeler on the other side. Alex, you're walking no matter
what. Sam... Chris... whichever one of you makes it there with me
first can sit on the back and ride. I..."

Alex interrupts again...

"Well I'll just drive through the fence and..."

You point out the barricades, spikes, and boulders designed to make
that practically impossible.  While not exactly the contingency you
had in mind when building the fence, it seems to be working out for
the best.

"Okay, in that case, if you show up to the valley, I'll shoot you
myself."

Sam looks towards the dirt and shuffles about uncomfortable with all
the noise while Chris pipes up, "Well I'm sticking with Alex.  Are
you going to shoot me too?"

"Guys, we shouldn't split up. We have to stick together!"

Sam... always reasonable.

"Well Sam, you can stick with me and Chris, or go ride off to this
so-called "valley" with Chunky McSlowpants over there."

Sam decides to go with you.  The two of you make it through the man
gates and hop on the ATV, and then run over to the inside part of
the gate controls.  You pull the breaker.  The spring-loaded barricades
in the man gate path pop open.  Alex and Chris have no chance of
making it through the perimeter fence unless they find an acetylene 
torch.

You hear them bickering in the distance.  The bickering turns to
screams of horror.  Then silence.  Eaten by zombies.  A suitable
fate.

You and Sam make it to the valley with the rest of the survivors... about
a dozen in all.  The zombie outbreak isn't all bad.  It seems to have
cured all other diseases.  You and the survivors in the valley live for
another century as the last of the humans.  One by one, the lights
go out.  Now begins the age of the birds.


======================

c) revenge:

"...Guys... It's all water under the bridge."

Except, it wasn't.  You give them the rundown of everything that has
happened over the past 18 months.  You say you'll lead them to the valley,
but you have other plans.  You share a bag of beef jerky and hand out
a few water bottles.  Not your full supply, not even close.  But the smell
of the beef jerky is key to your revenge.


As you make it to Perimeter Fence 13... there's a problem.  The
zombies have attacked the gate control box.  Well... at least that's how
you made it appear.  You direct them towards the man gate about a quarter
mile from the main gate on the road.

"Go! Go! Go!"

You funnel them in... and they fall into the pit designed to trap any bandits,
trespassers, are smart zombies.  Yes... the pit.  The wolf pit.  The *zombie*
wolf pit.  They don't normally go for humans, but for whatever reason, the
smell of beef is something they can't resist.  They devour those that betrayed
you.

The watchman saw it all from his oberservation tower.  He reports your actions
to the community of survivors in the valley.  Before you make it back they 
have already decided.  You are to be cast out.  They meet you at the gatehouse
to the valley with your personal belongings and a tub of provisions.

You have no choice, so you leave.  You settle in an old cliff dwelling.  It's
not as nice as the valley, but you'll survive, and survive you do.  You spend
the next century alone and eventually die of old age.


===================

d) you saw it coming from a mile away...

"...Guys... It's all water under the bridge."

How dare they!  In the middle of your plot to show them what true strength is,
they betray your trust, using you as a diversion so they can get to safety. They
didn't care about you, only what they could get from you, just like the others,
and that is why the world must burn.

You give them the rundown of the past 18 months, or at least what they need to hear 
to get them to trust you.  Little did they know, not only did you thrive during the
outbreak, it was your idea.  A few years ago you managed to get some data about failed
experiments at the SENS Institute. You saw through the failure, and seized on its
potential.  On the plus side, everyone will be healthy as long as they don't succumb
to physical injury.  On the downside, a zombie outbreak.

Fortunately, you prepared for this world of horror you created. You bought a large
tract of land in the desert. In the middle is a nice, defensible valley, with ample
fresh water and naturally arable land.  It could easily support around 100 individuals
indefinitely.  You even built rings of fences and barriers to give further protection.
It was this promise of security that you would use to destroy those that betrayed you.  

With their backs turned, you shoot them in the back with a pellet gun.  The pellets
are all laced with the tainted blood.  Alex and Chris were no problem, but as you
shoot at Sam, they turn around. You miss.  The pellet ricochets off a fence post
and strikes you in the eye. This close to the brain, the turn is practically
instantaneous.  Quickly, Sam manages to shoot you in the head, a death with more dignity
than deserved for what you did to this world.

Not knowing what to do, Sam decides to try and make it to the valley you mentioned.  To
their surprise, it was as you said.  Even though you were a complete evil maniac, you
were at least well-prepared.  Sam manages to bring in other survivors, as few there were.
Ultimately, this was the end of the age of man, and the beginning of the age of birds.