What if…
What if, in the name of security, we forced systems to be connected to the public internet and added a fragile dependency to an online service? I bet people would pay $3/user/month or more for the privilege.
Wordle 403
Wordle 403 4/6*
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USPS delivers early
I know everyone gives @usps grief, and I certainly want to know the why when something takes a week and half to travel a couple of hours away, but rarely do we say anything when something goes right. I had a package that came Parcel Select. It was scheduled to be delivered Friday, assuming everything went right. Well, everything went exceptionally great and it was delivered this morning.
Seeing as how this was my backup plan kit bot that I needed to fill in for my “I should have actually measured those pulleys months ago” bot that would have fought with no active weapon had it not arrived, I’m definitely happy.
One of many reasons to stay off social media
A big shout out to the stupidly wealthy out there that have the common decency to keep their private matters private. Also, a big shout out to the normal folk out there that do the same. This stupid world we live in… minor interpersonal drama is now international news. Just stop it.
Top 10 Data Solutions
There are many solutions for data out there. It is difficult to sort through the available choices. Our editors have compiled a list of the top ten data solutions on the market today.
10. An Egg
It’s hard to believe it, but eggs contain DNA and it takes over 100 kilobytes to store all the data in the genome of an animal that may have an egg. Noted companies that deal with eggs are Cal-Maine Foods and the National Egg Board. Egg-based solutions are highly customizable. Some prefer to use cardboard carriers, while others will fry them. If security is a concern, it is possible to scramble the egg. There are even annual events where highly-decorated eggs are created. They are convenient and compact. Consider an egg for your data solution needs.
9. Wood
Much like an egg, a wood contains data and by various mechanical and chemical preparation can can be turned into a variety of handy solutions. This technology is still new, so caution is advised. Noted wood providers are ground, forest, and Weyerhauser. Wood comes in a variety of sizes, such as twig, for whatever your needs are. There are even subdermal wood implants available, though some users complain that the wood is painful to use. Wood offers excellent security when discarded as it can be erased by fire for immediate concerns, or left to weather and rot
8. Rock
Rocks have been used for data for over a thousand years. The oldest known rock data solutions exist in France. Consider rock for your data solution.
7. Computer
Computers are a recent data solution. While not as risky as wood, their major draw back is that they require power to function. Computers can be large or small and are available from many manufacturers.
6. Rail car
I’m sure you have seen a rail car, but if not, they are big. Hard to imagine how much data solution can be handled by rail car! While it is possible to move much data by rail car, they are limited to tracks and require expensive locomotives to initiate data transfer, and some have reported that the companies that move the rail cars can be difficult to work with and will charge exorbitant fees to access the rail network to use the data solution you already paid for, assuming you did not fall into a data solution rental contract. This data solution is best left to experts in moving rail cars.
5. Paper and Pencil or Pen
A time-tested solution for well over a century, some have said this is just an implementation of wood, while others argue it is a distinct service. No matter your opinion, we think you’ll agree that this data solution is convenient and relatively inexpensive. However, it is not well-suited for large solutions. For that you will need…
4. Paper and Printer
Printer is available from palm-sized to hundreds of feet long. When combined with paper, this data solution will allow you to create exact copies of your data as many times as you need, until the PC LOAD LETTER alert comes on. Our editors have been unable to determine what this alert means and simply buy a new digital printing press each time it happens.
3. World Wide Web
Some have said the World Wide Web will revolutionize the information super highway. This data solution is available in most places in the world. Noted World Wide Web manufacturers include Apache Web Server, the Google Alphabet, and Engine Ten.
2. Cloud Computing
Some say this is just computer, while others argue it is World Wide Web. However, we find that the pay-as-you-go model of cloud computing data solution warrants its own category. The pioneers of cloud computing are AWS East and Tymnet.
1. Digital Television
Ever since the analog TV went away, we have used digital television, which provides a stream of data to your location. While some find the ad-supported model of digital television to be repulsive, it is difficult to argue that a data solution that can reach so many with such a small amount of effort is something worthy of praise.
We hope you found this list of top ten data solutions to be useful. Our experts are available 24×7 for a free consultation.
Editor’s note: In case it wasn’t obvious, this is satire.